Why is it that men must have their toys? Whether it is cars or bikes, electronics, guns, or some other expensive vice it seems that most men just can not stay away from that stuff. To be fair there are also plenty of women that can't stop buying shoes, or purses, or expensive salon treatments, it just so happens that I am not one of those women. Sure, I would love to be able to buy new things whenever I want, but getting our family in a better place financially has become more important to me and so those things have been put on the back burner for now.
Yesterday a package arrived that my husband, who was working from home, ran to the door to sign for. When I asked what it was he told me it was something he had ordered for his home office, and I didn't think anything about it. A little while later he asked if I am happy after giving birth to our baby girl a few weeks ago, and I knew right then that he had done something he thought I was not going to be happy about...boy was I ever right! Later that evening he finally admitted that the package that came was an X-Box 360, and that he had also ordered a laptop that hadn't been shipped yet. I started crying, being the hormonal wreck that I am right now after giving birth a few weeks ago, and told him I didn't think what he had done was fair...not to mention the fact that he did it behind my back. He has been talking about getting that X-Box for awhile now, and I have been totally against it for two reasons: it is too expensive and the price will come down in a few years, and he already has an X-Box that he doesn't play all that much. Well, he decided about a week ago to go ahead and put that and the laptop (which he says was for me) on a credit card. I just don't understand why, when we have been working so hard to pay off our credit card debt this year and have made so much progress?!
After a lot of discussion, tears (mine), apologies (his), and debate, he is keeping the X-Box but canceled the order for the laptop saving us around $1,600. I think the X-Box will add around $350 to $400 to our credit card debt, not including interest. As silly as it may seem I'm glad he canceled the laptop, but in a way feel guilty that he didn't get what he wanted. I want my family to have the best, but sometimes (a lot of times) that is not financially possible and we all have to make sacrifices for the greater good of the family.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
A Boy and His Toys
Posted by Tracy at 12:33 PM
Labels: credit cards, spending
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7 comments:
I cannot believe he did that to you. He's damaging your family goals and he is definetely not in for the ride of financial freedom. Is he selling his old Xbox? he should and apply that to the new one.
and then a $1,600 laptop, what does it do balance your checkbook while making dinner!!!
you guys have to have an agreement of the amount of money that you guys can spend without consulting to each other, for the sake of the relationship. Why would he ask if you were happy about giving birth to your nw baby, that is manipulative.
Oh, I'm sorry. I also have a problem telling my hubby and son no.
However, I am the one who hasn't been good with money. I went out of town last weekend and spent over $200. Yikes! Now we are broke and it's all my fault. I'm late on a couple of bills, waiting for to get paid on Friday.
It is so very hard to pay off debt. I am totally with you.
Hang in there!
Congrats on your baby girl!
I'm glad that your husband came clean and canceled the lab top. J would tan my hide if I did something like that.
I sympathise. It is so tough when my husband does something like that. Firstly I feel it is unfair because I should get a gift too. Then I realise that I have a financial goal to reach and I will not do if I buy myself gifts.
Thanks for all the comments and encouragement! It it good to know that we are not the only ones who struggle with this kind of thing.
foreigner: I think he is giving his old X-Box to his dad. Each of us has an allowance in our budget, but he would probably have to save it for a year to be able to afford something like that X-Box.
Wow, that is such a bummer that he did that. Marriage can be so hard sometimes, especially financially, and especially when goals may not be seen exactly the same.
My husband and I have a rule. We can't purchase anything over $100 without discussing it first. When he gets bonuses from work we save at least 50% of it then divide the what is left in half and we get a no questions asked spending. We both get the same amount and it is fair. Seems to work out pretty well. It can be hard on the person that doesn't do the finances to never have any money to spend. They feel controlled, so this was a way we worked out a little splurge spending. If you don't get bonuses maybe you could do it with tax returns. Just a thought ... :-)
That is exactly how he feels, and I can't blame him. He is the one that works 40 hours a week, but I do all the financial stuff, so when I tell him all he can spend is $20 for the month it is hard for him to follow that.
Our budget is really tight because we are trying to pay down debt and save a little. There isn't much room at all for splurge spending. I like the idea of splitting bonus money, or any other little windfall we may get, in half. Thanks for the input! Maybe we will try that next time, it would probably help us stick to the month to month budget better.
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