Goldfish and Determination

Don't be afraid of opposition. Remember, a kite rises against, not with the wind.
-Hamilton Wright Mabie

My goal this week is to stick to the budget and to not use a credit card to cover little extras. I've had to do that some lately and it's not something I want to do. There is currently 43 cents in our checking account and one more day to go before payday. I am out of cash but I am very determined to stand my ground this week.

Yesterday I realized we had a baby item I hadn't used and I returned it to the store and got a decent amount of groceries with that money. I felt like I'd won the lottery walking around with a return card for $36.99 in my wallet. The little kid in me was screaming, "ooh, ooh, OOH you could buy some chocolates and Dr. Pepper with some of this new found money." That little kid is LOUD. I seriously debated for a bit but instead I wrote up a prioritized grocery list and worked my way down it until all of the money had been spent. The chocolates and Dr. Pepper didn't make it out the store with me.

It's funny the mental state you get into when you're trying so hard for something. I've been getting pretty creative with meals. I've had to plan my grocery trips down to the penny. Today I went through my husbands pockets looking for change. We were out of milk (a necessity) and I am out of money and just so happens he doesn't spend his change. And you know things are crazy when finding a bag of goldfish crackers in the back seat of the car while you're working evokes pure bliss and excitement. I'd only brought a granola bar with me today.

After documenting my last two days of spending I must mention that I am fully aware that there are people all over this planet who are without food for days at a time, haven't any access to clean water, or health care, or sanitary living conditions. I am not struggling. I am well fed, well housed, and employed. The only situation that I am currently dealing with is trying to get myself and my household out of the debt hole we dug. My struggle is purely an emotional one, fighting urges and entitlement issues which tell me that I should have access to everything my little heart desires. This is not reality.

The thing we must realize is that emotions can be very strong but you decided whether or not to give them power. Sometimes I win and sometimes I lose but I decide.

Daily spending average for July thus far: $11.31
Average daily spending for the year: $14.37