Sunday, May 20, 2012

What Would Little Kid Me Think

While driving to work the other day I was giving thanks to God for blessing me and my husband with an absolutely amazing little boy. I thought a bit about him growing up and becoming a completely independent adult. The entire world lies before him. Then I started to think about my childhood. I was a really happy adventurous little kid. I can remember dreaming about growing up all the time. For most of my childhood I wanted to be an architect or a writer. For all of my childhood I dreamed of getting older and having independence and freedom, being really happy as an adult and living life to the fullest. Kids are so unaware of the confines of adulthood; the responsibilities that are inescapable; obligations and expectations.

As I was pondering all of this I had to wonder what the little kid me would think of the adult me. I think I've made a lot of really good decisions. Little me would most likely be thrilled at my home and family and who I've become. (even though she was certain that one day I'd be living in a ginormous home with and indoor pool, secret passages and hidden rooms) However I imagine she'd wonder why I don't travel more, spend more time outside, be more active, explore artistic endevours (creating, writing, drawing, photographing). I guess I'd have to give her my lame excuses: debt, tiredness/ laziness. I'd be saddened to see my son grow up only to be stuck in a rut of sorts due to debt and lack of motivation. I'd like little me to be super proud of the life I'm living.

Blah, blah, blah... kids are so unaware of the confines of adulthood. But more often than not I think adults accept lame excuses for inactivity and call life confining. I'm not in any way upset with who I am or my life but I can work on the excuses and do more living. Just another good reason to tackle the debt!

I'd love to have more free time/ less working time
to garden more
visit my friend in Sweden
teach my son about the world
stare at the stars and watch sun sets
see the Grand Canyon and red wood trees
be with the hubby
spend time with family
return to Guatemala
smell the roses

What would little kid you think of who you've become?


  1. Great read!
    I would probably be more depressed with child me. As a child I dreamed of just leaving my family. I was never fond of them, and am still not to terribly so but cheap rent and whatnot. I would have been more open to the idea of travelling and moving away when I was jobless for a while, I would have made myself make it work, but instead I let my boyfriend talk me into staying here, my child self saw no interest in the idea of an S.O., and would not have wanted herself tied down like so, but what can you say, love makes people do funny things. :P

    I will note that my child self would be ECSTATIC at the thought of my pursuing my dream despite my always having felt to stupid to do so. Granted I might not be exactly a "robot-builder" but I'm damned close and I could imagine my child-self having her eyes light up at watching a CNC machine go! :)

  2. Really good question. Something to really think about. I dont think my kid self would be really happy with me right now. But I know now, that I will get there at some point.
    What I am proud of, is that I choose me over everyone else and helping out the person I need to take care of. For once I did, what I thought was the right thing. And it is working great so far.
    I am still working on my dreams and I'm still dreaming. Trying not really grow up at all...

  3. I have never thought of what my child self would think of my grown up self.
    I didn't spend much time thinking about growing up when I was a kid so I guess she would think grown up me is pretty okay.
    I love this question and will probably think about it more often.

  4. I wanted to work in a really impressive field, like be a doctor, lawyer, President of the United know, power jobs. So I wonder now if little kid me would be proud of the person I've become? I know the adult me is proud; priorities changed as I got older, and now I am doing what I love. But kid me? She'd probably be upset until she got to the point in life where she realized power is not happiness. Ah, little-kid-me is cute, but she has so much to learn!

    1. I have a lot of admiration for little kid me. She was really passionate and such more of a dreamer than I am now. I don't think people should ever stop dreaming just because they start getting older. Your dreams most certainly will change but ideally we keep dreaming AND pursuing the dreams!