first harvest of the year and the most screwed up dessert bread ever

Yesterday we picked one gorgeous zucchini from our garden. Today we attempted to turn it into lemon zucchini bread. *Attempted*

My husband is manager over the produce department at his store. I called him at work and asked if he could please bring home one lemon so we could make the bread. I should have just taken the kids to the store before he even got home because, if you aren't already suspecting it he did not bring home a lemon. So, determined to stick to the plan we three ran to the store to get one lemon.

Get home. Start getting read to make bread... uh oh, no eggs. I was not going to run back to the store so Google search egg substitute and land on 1.5 tablespoons vegetable oil, 1.5 tablespoons water plus 1 tsp. baking soda per missing egg.

I debated but I'm the absolute queen of annoying my husband by altering recipes because either I am missing something or I think it sounds good a different way so I just went with the weird egg substitute thing. Abe had a great time zesting and juicing the lemon and he said it was a ton of fun grating the zucchini. At least that part was a win.

After the batter came together I realized it was going to be strange. I threw in a large handful of coconut (because I really like coconut and) to balance out some of the liquid. I had the thought in the back of my mind that it would have been wise to put the mixture in a sheet cake pan instead of a loaf pan. I should have stuck with my gut because the loaf came out WAY more like a lemon bar then a lemon bread or cake.

See all that sugar on top, WELL that's supposed to be a glaze. I had powdered sugar AND we kept back some of the lemon juice to mix with it and make the glaze. I made the glaze (totally according to the recipe) but I'm pretty sure my powdered sugar is way too old and has soaked up every flavor in the baking cupboard because the glaze tasted awful! Okay, lets be clear Abe loved it. He said it tastes... wait for it... just like Willow (the neighbor's dog). LOL

Me: WHAT?!?!?! It tastes like a dog?!?!?!
Him: Yeah, just like she smells but it's good, she smells good!

Me: Yeah, no it's official we are not putting dog frosting on the lemon zucchini weird.

So, I just topped it with plain sugar. The glaze had 1 cup of powdered sugar in it and I might have put a 1/4 cup of regular sugar on top instead so it's healthier now, right...

Wow. That poor zucchini, sacrificed it's short life for vegan lemon coconut olive oil zucchini weird bar bread cake. For the record, it does actually taste good but I think I need to hide it from my husband who has been napping during this entire ordeal. He will never let me live this one down.