All Her Household is Clothed With Scarlet

Who can find a virtuous wife?
For her worth is far above rubies.
The heart of her husband safely trusts her;
So he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life. 

She seeks wool and flax,
And willingly works with her hands.
She is like the merchant ships,
She brings her food from afar. 

She also rises while it is yet night,
And provides food for her household,
And a portion for her maidservants.
She considers a field and buys it;
From her profits she plants a vineyard. 

She girds herself with strength,
And strengthens her arms.
She is not afraid of snow for her household,
For all her household is clothed with scarlet.
Proverbs 31: 10-17, 21

The woman described in this passage has always fascinated me. I have never imagined woman of Bible times to be buying fields and planting vineyards or having anything at all to do with financial matters. But this woman is taking care of her family and household, working diligently, is strong, confident and excels with money.

I heard something that really stuck out to me on the radio the other day: what's another way that you can say I love you? My husband has less than zero interest in our financial affairs. I hope that this will change as time progresses but for now I am very alone in trying to keep our house in order. I've learned over the years that alot of women find themselves dealing with this situation. But I thought of this scripture when I heard that question. One way I can say I love you is by doing a really good job at dealing with our finances. Maybe my husband doesn't really care but me excelling at finances (or at least attempting to) is really a very good way of saying I love you.

Sometimes when a task becomes daunting you just have to think about things differently.

NO SPEND day 63 it is.

And Happy Birthday to one of my most faithful readers and dearest friends!!!

Hope your day was AMAZING : )

Sixty Two

62 NO SPENDs are in the books! Every new one I mark off pushes me closer to my goal of 104 this year. I'm pretty horrible at goals so I do get giddy when I'm home for the evening and no money has left my hands, wallet, bank account or otherwise.

We've 84 more days to take advantage of this year and I've 42 more no spends to tackle. Giddy up!

And thanks for the comments on my grumble, grumble blog. You guys are pretty great. Thank-you for kind words and encouragement. (I hate money)

Gripe, Gripe, Complain, Complain

This is going to be one of "those" blogs. I try not to blog often when I'm grouchy but this one's been compiling. Please refrain from reading if you don't want to hear it.

We've been having such "fun" with money the past few weeks! The brakes on the car seized up a few weeks back. Pretty much everything brake related needed to be replaced. I scraped together about $300 for the repairs (in other words paid EVERY bill late last month) and charged $230. Oh the agony!

Our fridge was on it's way out and leaking. A friend of my husbands offered us a used fridge (much MUCH newer than ours) that he had in his garage. He only wanted $100 for it. That is a good deal and some refuse company will give us $50 for ours after they haul it away. Needless to say we jumped at it. But we have a new fridge now and we have not paid hubby's friend and that $100 is weighing on my mind.

Yesterday, now this is a good one, I noticed that our bedroom walls were wet! I decided that rather than hope they clear up (during the rainy autumn season) and possibly have to tear down half our house later on I needed to get a de-humidifier and clear them up ASAP. Unfortunately I'm almost certain the moisture is coming from a VERY wet room in our basement so I purchased, with a credit card, two de-humidifiers for $460. It would have been nice if we had that emergency fund eh?!

Work has been VERY slow for most of the year. There are these small annoying doctor and dentist bills to the sum of about $250 that I cannot seem to knock out. Now we've almost $1100 in strange malfunctioning home and car purchases that popped up over the past few weeks. Needless to say I feel like I'm failing miserably with money. It's a yucky feeling.

On the bright side (because a blog like this one always needs a bright side) I'm a much more responsible spender than I was in my younger days. My hours at work over the past few weeks have picked up. The walls in the bedroom look 100 times better than they did yesterday. The basement is dryer that it's been in months. Our fridge is lovely (the old one was nasty). And the car is no longer shaking violently like it's about to blast off into space while we drive it.

I might not be getting ahead but I'm not drowning. That's a good thing right. I LOVE being an adult!!!

(I probably won't publish comments on this post. I'm just venting. Thanks.)

October is Here

I finally, FINALLY made it to NO SPEND day 60! Four days in a row I'd planned a no spend. But "wait the dogs are out food. Oh SHOOT I forgot to get laundry detergent and toilet paper." One of the days I was just grouchy and coffee won out over my resolve. I'm so excited to be to finally have marked off day 60. TWO MONTHS (cumulatively) of not spending one single penny. Woohoo!

In other news it is October. Did anyone else get that memo? I'm a little in shock. I do LOVE autumn though. And I've already drank about a gallon of apple orchard apple cider. Hot apple cider in the evening... it doesn't get much more lovely than that!

Leftovers Quiche

I planned to make quiche today but I find it funny how it came together. I used the remaining cheese, little chunk of meat, few slices of bacon, and half a roma tomato that I had left in the fridge:

Leftovers Quiche!

Here's the recipe for a very yummy dinner. It starts with the pie crust recipe from the Pioneer Woman that I altered a bit because I just don't use crisco. This recipe makes 2 or 3 pie crusts depending on how thick you like it. I always use it to make two. I don't think I'm genteel enough to make three crusts and not tear them to bits while trying to put them in the pie pan.

For two pie crusts mix together:

3 cups of flour

1 cup of softened butter

1 egg

1 teaspoon of salt

1 tablespoon of vinegar

5 tablespoons of cold water

Divide the dough into two or three balls depending on how thick you want your crust.

Place each of the balls into a separate unsealed ziploc bag and flatten them a bit.
Then roll each ball out into a circle that just fits within the bag.
Seal the bags and place them in the refrigerator (at least 20 minutes) if you'll be using them that day or in the freezer for later use.
When you're ready to make your pie, take the cold dough out of the baggy. I rip the bag right off. You can easily roll the dough out with very little flour and virtually no mess. The bags are a bit wasteful but they also allow you to make very hassle free pie crust. I would never be making my own crust if I hadn't learned this trick. I LOVE it!

For the quiche:
6 eggs
1/2 cup of milk
1 tablespoon of flour
1/2 to 3/4 cups of cheese

desired amount of salt and pepper
desired amount of meat and or veggies

Place the rolled out crust into the pie pan. Whisk together the eggs, milk, and flour. Then pour that into the crust. Sprinkle the cheese, meat, and veggies over the egg mixture. I usually pat the top a few times with a spoon after everything is in the pan but I don't stir it all together. I'm not sure why though. It's just what I do.

Bake 375 degrees for 35 minutes.

If you like gooey runny quiche then this recipe is not for you. I've had some pretty gooey quiches at a few different restaurants and talk about a good way to ruin someones day. I can't stand runny quiche. This recipe has made a nice fluffy firm quiche every single time I've made it. We love it, even the munchkin scarfs it down.

And that is one of my fairly frugal scrumptious dinners.

Quiche and Stuff

In case you were wondering turkey pepperoni and cheddar cheese quiche is actually really scrumptious. I had my hesitations but it was all I could come up with for dinner with what we had in the house.

NO SPEND day 56 is in the books and another yummy quiche has been devoured.

I got a really great quiche recipe from my sis in law and I altered the Pioneer Woman's pie crust recipe a bit. Talk about easy made from scratch pie crust! Maybe when I'm not feeling so over tired (just got home from work) I'll actually post a good cheap recipe on this blog of mine.

Night!

Here's me, learning how to be a tidy grown person

You know how your grandparent's house was always so neat and tidy? Seriously nothing was ever out of place. Every single grandparent's home I've ever been to has been neat and tidy; everything in it's place and a place for everything. My husband and I purchased his grandparents home when his grandpa passed. I remember visiting this place while my husband and I were dating. I was always afraid of setting a dish on the side table because the home was so very pristine. Who was I to leave a mark somewhere?

Now this house (once so lovely) feels like a dump sometimes. I honestly believe that 75% of the items in this house do not have a home. I am working on that. Here's what I'm wondering though, when our grandparents were 20, 30, late 30 years old were their homes messy too? I doubt they were but were they? Is it something we grow into and master with age or really am I just broken? 

I have a feeling that it's a generational thing. I have a feeling that my grandparents never lived in a messy home, that everything always had a place, and that they held high value for everything in their homes. I'm sure my grandparents didn't throw things away when they got "old" like this generation is in the habit of doing. They didn't "need" as much as we do. They took pride in cleanliness and were taught to do so by their parents. I don't know though. I could probably type pages on this vein. Do you think they had messy homes when they first moved out on their own and were learning how to house keep?

I think about these things a lot when it comes to spending money. I think we're messier now. I think things are so come and go now a days that we don't feel the need to find good homes for them. I'd like to place high value on the items in my home just as my grandparents did. I'd like to kick things out that don't belong and I'd like to invite less things in; goals, lots and lots and lots of goals.

Mid September Stargazing

Whew, that took awhile. I've been saving receipts but not tallying my spending for the past month. I just entered over 30 days of receipts onto the spending page. It was a boring task but I feel an enormous weight off my shoulders.

2013 Financial Goals
1. Average $13.50 a day spending currently $14.83
2. 104 NO SPEND days currently 54
3. No more than 45 days off the record currently 50
4. Maintain $1000 emergency fund currently $2
5. Stick to a monthly Zero-Based Budget Not currently doing so great

There are 106 days left of 2013. I was pretty excited about where I'm at with the NO SPEND challenge until I just announced that I'm going to have to not spend anything just about every other day for the rest of the year to meet my goal. That's a tad bit scary. I think I can still track down my spending for a few of the off record days but I'm afraid I'm over the 45 days mark even so. I'll up that minimum to 50. I need help with my emergency fund for sure. Why is it SOOOO difficult for me to get $1000 in the bank? It's awful. As for the budget, I did good in August. September is only half over. I think I can get the zero based budget back on track for this month too.

Oh, and the average... I've $1153.38 left to spend for the entire rest of the year (106 days) if I'm to meet my $13.50 a day challenge. That's only $10.88 a day, or $21.76 every other day if I'm tackling those NO SPENDs too.

I certainly won't say that I excel at challenges BUT "reach for the stars and you might hit the moon..." or maybe even a few of the stars, right. Speaking of stars if I were to actually hit $12 a day for this year I've only got $680.88 left in the budget for the rest of 2013. Now that is brutal! $1153 is starting to look pretty good.

Today's lovely: My 18 month old son very meticulously colored something that resembled a beautiful jelly fish. This kid fills my world with amazement and awe.

Unexpected Beauty

I've been noticing a considerable increase in the amount of men standing with signs lately. I'm not sure what's caused the influx but I can count 5 regular locations where you'll often find a man with a sign in my town and the two neighboring it. Last year there was just one location and it was owned by just one man. Apparently he's started a trend.

All these men with signs don't look like alcoholics or drug addicts (because you  know I'm an expert at spotting such people) but I still haven't stopped to give a single one of them money. Not the guy who holds, "unemployed. will work for food." He's the original sign man by the way, the one who was given a Starbucks drink that one time. I haven't given money to the guy who holds, "single dad. need help." Nor the man who holds, "retired vet. need work." And I certainly didn't give money to the kid (I'm talking 17 years old) holding a piece of paper that read... who knows what; it was too small to read. Or any of the others. I hardly ever see anyone give these men money either.

I've thought alot about them. These sad looking men holding signs on corners where traffic is rushing by stir up such emotions as pity, sadness, apathy. You really do want to help but it just doesn't feel right. Here's where I interject my true thoughts. There are thousands of cars driving by these guys each hour.We're talking rushing traffic, huge intersections, TONS of cars (with people in them). Lets say 1 out of every 500 cars stops and gives sign man $10. That's WELL over $20 an hour. That's 2 or 3 or 4 times more than I make at my job, working, BEFORE TAXES. These guys would NOT be standing with that sign if people didn't give them money. "Unemployed. Will work for food" stands on his corner like a full time job at least 5 days a week. He's making money. I'm sure of this.

Today I saw something different. I exited the highway and stopped at a red light in a line of 8 cars. I was at one of the regular sign man intersections but there was a man without a sign. Actually he didn't look sad or pitiful. He was a fairly handsome white haired old man and he was playing a violin at a VERY busy intersection with traffic rushing by. It seemed a lot different than a regular street performer playing for folks strolling around in a downtown shopping area during their free time.

I turned off the radio, rolled down the window and smiled to myself, "how lovely!" Then I decided that I wanted to give this guy money. He didn't have sign. He wasn't exactly asking for money but he was creating a totally unexpected bit of beauty in the midst of hustle and bustle and chaos and I felt the need to reward that. I also really liked the serene look on his face. It was as if his only goal was to make all of us rushing by in our cars smile, if only for a brief moment.

I pulled some money out of my wallet, waited for the light to turn green, and then had to chuckle as I watched 3 of the 8 cars in front of me hand him money as well. I guess the ratio for rewarding beauty versus begging is unmeasurable. I'm left wondering about life in general. Am I all talk or am I adding a bit of beauty to the busy world I live in? 

Give Me Five

I added two paragraphs to my book today which constitutes about 1 whole page.
And yesterday I taught my son "dame cinco!"
I'm on a roll.

Baby Steps (probably the 700th post with that title)

"With a thousand small steps."

I read that line in a book today and I was like, "you said it!" It took a thousand small steps to get so deeply into debt. It's going to take a thousand small steps to get out. It took a thousand small steps to become the me I am today. It'll take a thousand more small steps to get closer the me I'd like to be tomorrow. It took a thousand small steps to get to Guatemala. It's going to take a thousand small steps to finish writing about it.

Life isn't super easy but it's worth the toil.

A Brain Storm

"If you reach for the stars you might hit the moon."

I'm not sure who first said it but with me this is so very, VERY true. I think the problem lately is that I've only just been reaching for the neighboring town and only just been making it out my front door. Forget the stars or the moon.

Remember when you were a child, people asked you all the time, "what do you want to be when you grow up." When I was six I'd always answer, "I'm going to be a writer." And I was going to be. At six I didn't think about the path there, about life experience or college just that I was going to be a writer. When I was ten I'd answer, "an architect. I draw houses." And I did, constantly. You know most ten year old girls draw pictures of horses, princesses, landscapes with apple trees and fluffy clouds? I drew houses, blueprints, layouts. I had piles and piles of blueprints for fabulous houses. And there were different page numbers on the top for the different levels. Some houses had 10 floors. But two of them were underground, not basements though, underground secret levels that you could only get to by pulling the candlestick on the wall in room number 20. I switched back to wanting to be a writer about about age fourteen. But in highschool I decided I wanted to be an artist. In high school people take you seriously and most adults who found out my aspirations told me I was silly. "You can't make money on art." This is when dreams started to grow legs... they weren't just going to happen, I had to make them happen. OH MY GOSH... that's a reality check. And this is when they started to die.

On yesterday's post I received this comment:

I'm sure, that you will dream again. About loads of other things. I've just started to let my dreams in again. They're not dead, just changed and adjusted. I grew up and my dreams with me.-Lottebees

I think while I was growing up my dreams were growing down. On the phone a few weeks back with my friend I really realized that I'd let most all of my dreams go. I'm not a kid anymore. I have to make things happen now. Making things happen is too hard. That's really what it's about though isn't it? It's not that my dreams are as unreachable as the stars. It's that I have to make them happen. Yikes.

Like I said yesterday I've been reading and brainstorming. I've found of few dreams wandering in this waiting area where I'd left them, thought I lost them, but really had just forgotten them. I'm pretty certain I'm not going to have the five children I'd hoped for but I am madly in love with the one I've got AND I'd almost lost sight of my dream to adopt. Who forgets one of the hugest dreams they'd ever had? This one is still feasible. I'm not going to go looking for a child tomorrow but I will start praying about this dream again.

About three years ago I wrote a kids book. I actually love the thing I just never got around to illustrating it. I think it's about time I get to that. And I also have a book that I want to call half written about my time in Guatemala. I'm an eccentric perfectionist and writing a book was more daunting than I'd anticipated. I have all these different paths that I'd like it to take but I need to choose one. I've spent the past several years letting the thing sit inside my computer never to see the light of day because I can't decide how I want to finish it. Turns out I may have become a writer after all I just haven't ever let myself admit it or finish anything.

Oh, and one last silly dream I remembered today. I was going to be fluent in Spanish before I welcomed a child into this world. Then every other day I would speak to this little gem in either English or Spanish. That didn't happen. But I do know some. I mean I can hold a half way decent conversation with a six year old in the  mountains of Guatemala (might I mention though that his or her Spanish isn't perfect either as their first language is actually Quiche (Key-chay)). Come on lets dream again!!! Why can't I speak to my son with the Spanish I already know while beginning to expand my vocabulary again? Yep, I can. And he can learn Spanish while I do. He's one, he can be fluent in two languages without any effort where as it's taken me 30 years of slowly SLOWLY acquiring bits and pieces of a second one (for those of you around the world who are fluent in two, three, and four languages; here in the States we are actually quite jealous).

Baby steps are key. This I've learned while blogging. Seems as though I'm halfway along to several of my dreams. I think a few baby steps towards the stars would be a very good thing.

Me allowing myself to dream again
Pray. Look into adopting. Get out of debt so that it becomes affordable.
Finish the children's book.
Finish the Guatemala book.
Speak Spanish to my little guy and learn more.
Plan a spectacular vacation and save up for it.

The best and biggest dream I ever had has already come true.

Hello, It's Me Again

My last post was almost 3 weeks ago. For someone who blogs almost everyday that's a pretty long time. I've been grouchy, defeated really and I don't much like blogging when all that's crossing my mind is "whoa is me."

A few weeks ago I found myself on the phone with a far away friend who I haven't spoken with, literally, on the phone spoken with in a long time. We keep in touch through facebook (oh what a wonderful deceptive communication tool). The reason for our literal conversation is because she had a break down and spent awhile in a hospital. She said something that really hit hard with me: That all her dreams are dead. That she'd reached the age where all the things she ever dreamt of seemed unrealistic. She'd sat down, looked at life and thought, "this is it. this is how it all turns out." I guess the thought was more than she could handle. But truthfully, without thinking it I've been in the same place for awhile now.

I was going to be a stay at home mom/ architect who designed homes with elaborate secret passages and indoor pools, writing awesome books on the side and traveling the world with my husband and 5 children. I might have also put on a few concerts singing beautiful catchy songs for fans... even if only a few. Honestly I have a difficult time making myself coffee in the morning whilst trying to get the kid and dogs fed, diapered, sent outside to potty (the dogs), and lastly dressed for the day (not the dogs). I know how she feels. It didn't turn out the way I'd hoped. And I realized, "wow. my dreams died awhile back too."

Okay so I have this dream of getting out of debt one day. What a horrible dream to be left with. My dream is to clean up a huge mess that hubby and I made? Really? That's lame! Truth is even if you haven't identified it, feeling like you've nothing left to dream for is horribly defeating. I am glad however that my friend put words to what's been weighing on my heart. I can't say I've been pulled up out of the mire, but I am realizing that I need to dream again. That's a start.

So, I think I'm back. And I'm ready to spice up the journey a bit.

A Lovely Morning Stroll

It's amazing how time can get away from us. I went for a walk this morning, my favorite route in fact. For 2 hours I walk a trail through town that takes me past the nicest yards with the hugest flowers, through the dune forest, past the lake, and right downtown. I realized as I took in my favorite sights that it's been over 2 years since I'd walked this pathway. I strolled my son along with me this morning for the first time (he's almost 18 months old) and I know I hadn't taken this path while I was pregnant. Wow, over two years since I went on my favorite walk. Where has time gone?

I felt as if I'd been reunited with an old friend today; watching the squirrels scurry along, listening to the variety of birds chirping their morning songs, hearing acorns tapping to the ground after falling from trees, that twisty tree that grew all spun around, that waterfall in some clever home owners back yard, the dune grass almost as tall as me sparkling in the sun, and the best part watching the gigantic Lake Michigan emerge from around the bend while out of breath from walking up a dune sidewalk.

The best things in life are free. Two years is far to long to have been away from these little things.

Might life altering beauty cross your path today as well!

Day 50

Well I did it. I made it to NO SPEND day 50. That means that collectively I've almost gone two entire months of 2013 not spending a single penny.

In the grand scheme of things I don't know how much of an accomplishment this is. I know some people grocery shop once a week. Some people live far out of town and don't get to purchasing things too often. But I think more people than not spend money practically every single day. You buy a coffee or a pop, you pick up a donut or a candy bar, you stop for a hair cut or pick up a gift for someone; spending money is easy peesy.

Well 50 days down, 54 days to go. I'm shooting for 104 days of not spending this year. It's kind of fun and it definitely saves me money. A dollar here and a dollar there adds up very fast.

Welcome August

My husband has been using up his vacation days rather sporadically the past few weeks so that they don't expire once his hire date rolls around this month. It's been wonderful spending time together and living with a well rested husband. I almost forgot what normal felt like. I do try and avoid the computer whilst he's home so I apologize for my absence. I haven't been blogging or tracking my spending that well. He's at work today and then he'll have a few more days off. I've been spending the morning annoying my son and entering my spending.

Here's where I'm at.

2013 Financial Goals
Average $13.50 a day spending currently $14.65
104 NO SPEND days currently 47
No more than 45 days off the record currently 40
Maintain $1000 emergency fund currently $52
Stick to a monthly Zero-Based Budget I think I pulled this one off this month

Free Fish and Mochas

My father in law stopped by with two huge fish that he caught in the lake. I broiled one up for dinner tonite with some long grain rice.

I found a tiny chocolate recipe book that a friend had given me back in high school. There was a recipe for a mocha that I thought, "hey why not give it a try?" I've mixed together milk, coffee, sugar, and cocoa before. It's always good but its never been SOO yummy. I've learned that it's best to start with a recipe and tweak it from there... at least for me. This was no exception. The mocha was really REALLY yummy this time.
1/2 cup milk
1 tbls. sugar (I know, that's alot... but I bet less than starbucks)
2 tsp. cocoa

1/2 cup of coffee

I've been going heavy on the coffee all these years. This recipe is a great balance for a yummy mocha.

This morning teething boy was cranky so we walked to the playground to let off some steam. I thought of inviting some friends but decided I'd like it to be just the two of us. Friends are wonderful but so is spending one on one time at the playground with your kiddo. It's fascinating watching this tiny man who was only months ago a helpless infant now climbing, running, discovering wood chips, birds, litter (yes litter is fascinating), laughing, giggling, being silly, and whooshing down slides all by himself. There are SO many priceless moments in this life!!!

and NO SPEND day 47 is in the bag!

Today was a calm but wonderful day. Shoot, calm is always wonderful!

Pit Stops and Victory Dances

I'll tell you what, last week was tough! This week I've been sticking to the budget pretty well. Today I didn't spend any money. It is definitely not easy following a plan. We just had to replace the breaks on the car. My husband changed them himself but the total cost still ended up being over $100. Even so I didn't have to break out a credit card. We didn't go into overdraft. I didn't have to borrow money from anyone. Maybe that's $100+ that I won't be putting into the emergency fund or paying towards debt but I'm surprisingly giddy about this little set back. In truth if I hadn't been trying so hard to stick to my super tight budget these past few weeks then we would not have been able to afford the car repair. The sense of accomplishment I feel after a tough week of penny pinching is great. Being able to afford a car repair with cash is like the cherry on top.

Victory dance!!!

Tuesday

I did not break down and buy all kinds of crazy things today.
I did splurge on a diet Coke and some chex mix. I also changed dinner plans for my husband who did not want spaghetti as I'd planned. I spent a bit more today than I could have but I stood my ground and didn't go crazy. I'm considering today a success.

Now for sleep! Someone is working on a few new teeth and he has NOT been sleeping well (thus mommy has not been sleeping well either).

Average daily spending for July: $13.41