Just checkin in.
Everything's sort of piling up and its making life heavy. Christmas is rapidly approaching. On one hand I'm excited for it. I love the lights, the music, the snow, the entire season of it really. There's just a whole different atmosphere surrounding Christmas and it makes for a great end to the year. However money is getting tighter everyday and at present there's NO money for Christmas. Knowing that I'm going to have to find/ pull some money from somewhere and that the season is just getting closer everyday is wearing.
The year is coming to a close and there are things I'd like to have accomplished: paying off the smallest card, having a certain amount in the savings fund for maternity leave, having reached a 20% credit card payoff. I'm not nearly where I'd like to be with any of those things. It's from stupid extra spending like when I'm bum tired after a 10 hour day and we go out for pizza. Or when the husband's work shoes suddenly fall apart. They literally fell apart. Or when someone was pretty sure they got a promotion and spent a bit more money on video games then they should have and then ended up not getting the promotion. (Seriously, I'm glad he's got the video games to take his mind off it though).
I haven't paid the car payment from last month yet and it's driving me crazy. Sometimes the money just isn't in the account when you need it you know.
I've also been gaining weight a bit faster than I should be with this little guy I'm growing. (yeah, everyone wants to hear about that huh) It's certainly not a huge deal but it's on my mind. I don't think my feet, knees, ankles... I don't think my body would be very happy with me if I gained 60 pounds before the little man arrives. I've been watching what I eat very closely and I'm realizing that I've been eating ALOT. (I do love food, and I'm pretty sure this child does too) Ugh, the many many humdrum's of life. Funny when life is heavy I can't stand the weight of it and all I want to do is sleep and eat and not pay attention to responsible things like, "how much money am I spending." I say it's funny because the very things that are weighing on me right now are the things I tend to fall back on when I'm stressed. Viscous cycle.
This year will come to a close. Christmas will come and go. I'm just going to have to try my hardest to focus on the accomplishments and not the missed goals. I can not let all the balls fall, not now, not just before the year closes. November is going to be a good month by golly!
HEY, hey... I have written AND mailed 2 of this months 30 Thanksgiving thank-you notes. Hooray for a little accomplishment there!