First and foremost I appreciate your comments. Thank-you to everyone who's shared a bit of input. It makes me feel very much like I'm not alone. This fight can feel VERY lonely at times.
Today I wanted to purchase everything I walked past while at work. It was actually quite weird because apart from food it's been a good six months at least since I've had troubles spending money on unnecessary random things. Today though I really had to force myself not to put neat toys for my nieces and nephews and sunday school kids (on clearance of course), random articles of clothing, and of course tons of food we do not need in my cart while I was working (I work as a merchandiser in a grocery store... actually a supermarket). About half way through the struggle I decided to make a list of things at home that I'm really blessed by and blessed to have.
My list went a little something like this:
-My husband... he likes to spend money but he's the best
- Our three furry children (two dogs and an aging grouchy cat... but she's awesome)
-The pumpkin nutmeg apple vanilla cinnamon walnut salad candle that my husband really randomly got for me I think for our anniversary last year. I'm burning it right now.
-My hot neck wrap, super sweet massage chair, hand scrub, and foot salve... all of which I plan on utilizing for relaxation sometime before bed tonite.
-The Kindle which rocks and I do not use often enough. (Christmas gift from the Mother in law)
-Comfy clothes and warm blankets (can you tell I'm trying to survive winter in Michigan)
-The opportunity and ability to be physically active (that was sort of my own little pep talk for exercising tonite) which I'm going to do after I finish writing this.
It's sort of a weird list. But it worked. As soon as I got done writing it I stopped being tempted by things all over the store that desperately wanted to come home with me. Today I spent $2.90. We are currently $30.84 over budget. I'm pretty sure I'll be able to reach the NO MORE THAN $20 overage by the end of the week. And it's all up hill from there... right.